Aston Villa today publicly submitted a transfer request on behalf of Emile Heskey, claiming that their ambition exceeds the talent at the disposal of the former England striker.
In an interview with Croatian newspaper Sportske Novosti the midlands club are reported to have said: “Frankly we feel disappointed that Emile hasn’t buggered off yet.
“Last summer we made a gentleman’s agreement that if a club matching his natural talent came in for him, then he wouldn’t stop us from trying to get him off our books. Naturally we are therefore extremely disappointed to hear that he has chosen to reject today’s offer from Rochdale.”
Villa fan John Yeates is a bit pissed off about it all: “In “In dendrological terms, Emile Heskey is an old Oak – large and looming, a wooden presence that apparently takes a fucking age to move when you’ve had enough of it.
“Analogies aside though, a football club really cannot win these days. If a Premier League player manages to take a break from shagging Page 3 birds long enough to actually play an acceptable few games of football, all the club seems to get in return is a few grumblings from the player about ambition, and a public flirtation with the first Russian bloke to throw him an extra wheelbarrow of gold.
“On the flip side, if the player turns to shit and becomes the bench warming equivalent of Bill Cosby’s zombie, the fucker still hangs around collecting his wages like some sort of expensive eggy fart. You have to question where that supposed ambition went to, don’t you?”
Heskey defended his stance on Twitter: “Look, as I have said many times in the past, I am trying to build for the future and staying on a wage that in no way matches my footballing ability is essential to that.
“I will not be sold this summer.”